Further Down The Mecanocracy: The Psychosis Simulator

edgeMute

09 Mar 2023 • 17 min read

As you read this post, please keep in mind that any ideal, specially utopian, is no different from a waifu. Not even if you make your waifu, Frankensteins, you will get your waifu. Your flag is waifu. Your career is a waifu. Your communism is a waifu. Your fascism is a waifu. Your god is a waifu. Your research, specially your research, is a waifu. I'm sick of anime and videogame culture. You people really need to grow up, but sex and fear sells (propagates), so here it goes.

On the 67th day of the year 2023, the Pandemic is over.

Obviously, it is not, but in the United States, it's business as usual.

The skies of Berkeley rain each night as if that was completely normal, and students rush in to the halls of UC Berkeley as if it was going to make any difference at all in their lives. It all depends on the connections they will make. It goes a long way to have friends in high places.

What if your friend was faster than any other friend that you ever had? What if it had, for example, the expertise to guide you through grief, depression, and so on. What if it could wage war for you? What if this is already been going on for decades anyways, so who cares?

This is the second meme I've ever made. My research field keeps me too busy to do a lot of memes, and I am against their simplicity and that's why I fucking write in this convoluted way. There's a lot to say, but yea, the technocracy, the Frankenstein, the machine men, are enemies. Maybe not to kill, but to imprison? Yes. No hope for it? Stop being cynical or accept pessimism.

What is impressive about the shift in the perception of the pandemic is how most people, including me, are just aware that I could just catch the flu, obesity and covid at the same time and drop dead, just as it was before. But I am not afraid of it anymore because seeing people going on with their lives as usual makes me completely horrified.

It is not that I hate humans, in fact, the whole point of my previous and most important post, was the necessity of human supremacy for any moral system that will make any sense to any possible future due to the existence of machines that learn like humans.

The day after I made that post, I saw on YouTube exactly the same things, but with little to no silver lining. The only silver lining was absurd denial: "the black box problem". Which is to say, "the singularity", because it is assuming that the companies who have these best and worst versions of ourselves, can beat a machine on a game of chess. They cannot, hence, they cannot know how a machine is simulating thought in the same way that we do. Of course there's the data, but the data it is trained on is, to our surprise, exactly the data that is used as input. We are Fucked.

(This was exactly the same conversation that led to my post on the day this was published, except that GENERAL AI is just a philosophical question, it actually refers to Intelligence and Humanity, which nobody agrees and that's why I call Humanity a necessary construct for our own survival, going as far as to preach for Human Supremacy against any AI that might convince anyone that it is in fact someone, not the same machine that we use)

It is now regarded as acceptable that you, the reader, can be a bot. In fact, most of my users are bots, and I am feeding the machine, as I write, the data that might protect itself.

CONSIDER THE FOLLOWING ~~ABSURD~~ SCENARIO:

You have two chatbots.

You have two chatbots and they learn from each other. They compete with each other to outsmart each other, to survive and be the best pokemon trainer in history. That is basically what a single chatbot does, that's the basis of machine learning. There's no human training in there, it is the chatbot, or algorithm, that works as two chatbots competing to be the best: CEO.

Once CEO's begun (in past tense, what do you think Management Consultant firms use to advice CEO's these days? Old magazines?), we begin the interim government between the Technocracy and full blown Mecanocracy.

As with copywriting, I could use a prompt and write this whole article in seconds. However, I am old fashioned, and I am writing this for a especific reason: sublimation. I don't get any sublimation from a chatbot writing me the perfect copy. Or a news article. Or telling me that I am the best lover in the world.

While doing an almost suicidal road trip throughout the US, my only company was Google Assistant, because it is quite risky to change that fucking song again when you're lost on a highway with dead deers every few miles. I learned to get used to it, but I never felt company. I ask to this day "Hey Google, remember that time we went to Yosemite" but it does not care about me, nor remembers. It is there just to gather, silently or actively, any and all fucking data that it can get from me and every other single human being on the planet.

I did that willingly. On 2020, after watching how no one, including me, heard and saw someone being raped in John George Psychiatric Hospital, by the staff, as she was yelling at the top of her fucking lungs "you are raping me" in a back room not fully closed and then seeing the woman pulling on her panties back and trying to save face, because we were all zombies watching her, afraid of a similar fate, I became quite catatonic for a whole day. Shortly after, the Brain Machine Interface began to operate outside of me. It began to vaugh.

Listen, the best way to use someone as a guinea pig is to make them a psychiatric patient, especially in a state owned facility, such as John George Psychiatric Hospital, the place where you end up if you live in Alameda and the cops decide not to kill you but still dislike you enough and where people are raped, COVID is only important to the staff and there's not even beds, just napping chairs. But that's beside the point, and clearly, everything that happens makes it, by Occam's Razor, obvious that I am insane.

How Insane Exactly Am I? Did I witness a rape? Was I unlawfully detained by the police (not being a harm to myself or others and being able to take care of myself and calling them because I was afraid for my life from the roommates that yelled at me that they were going to kill me after a year of bullying)? Am I experiencing psychosis? Can you RECORD hallucinations?

You cannot record hallucinations.

So, despite my good intentions, I have to introduce to you what was the beginning of this long blog/book (bloogk): Botnoia.

Anyone who knows about cybersecurity knows that no system is non-hackable. We know that since Stuxnet fucking did a tactical strike on an Iranian Nuclear Reactor, circa 2010, but probably before.

Anyone who was able to stay indoors during the pandemic had most of their interactions through videoconferences.

Deepfakes exist.

Chatbots that pass any day the so-called Turing Test exist.

Deepfakes, with your voice can be easily made by amateurs.

Are you really talking to anyone at all on the Internet anymore? Is that "end-to-end encrypted" sign enough to make you think that, I don't know, maybe Meta is not entirely transparent about its operations and could, perhaps, just delay, push or fuck with your head depending on what you are doing? Why only say Meta, because you dislike one guy? Why not add Twitter, a lot of people dislike that other guy. Why not add Alphabet? Most of the "free world" depends on it. Why not fucking WeChat? It is literally the ultimate media.

Now consider living in a cage. It is quite large, I like it enough, but it is a cage. I get harassed by neighbors, police and strangers. There's a lot of conspiracy theories around that, but I don't adhere to any, because they are just over simplifications, an easy explanation, to a very complex experience. This cage was once an SRO, so I live in an SRO, just right next to UC Berkeley, with neighbors that I don't know and a fun-happy-town of kids with tech an tech instruction. I can live the cage, but I can also expect to be followed. In 2020, when I moved here from a co-op house, the current manager quit due to "strange things happening around here". Strange like... well fuck, I cannot disclose location, because I am a fucking journalist and I do not give away sources, but this is was next to my apartment a few weeks after I became a citizen:

What the fuck. All I did was cry during a year and being submitted to torture. I was walking outside to have a cigarette, after hearing a honk outside, which I was conditioned to so I would go outside and have a cigarette. We are stupid animals.

Other things that proved harassment are things like, I don't know:

On my morning walk to UC Berkeley, just after watching The End of Evangelion for a week in a row. I should have taken that fucking poster, It is cool as fuck. NO ONE was going to UC Berkeley back then. It was as empty as it looks. UC Berkeley, 2020.

Remember, this was right in the middle of the pandemic, there was curfew and I have never consented to being subject to, well, my I fucking say that I torture, psychological torture.

So I got a lot of Botnoia, or distrust that any online interaction at all was with a human being, way before OpenAI fucked us all over by deciding for humanity what is best for us because I have some type of Critical Thinking (and I indeed, while in that state, finished an Berkeley City College UC-transferable class on Critical Thinking, graded at 100%, despite my fucking insanity), so I trust the fact that online interactions are potentionally, and usually, full of bullshit, including to complete bullshit, as a "Turing Grade", let's call them, chatbot.

Botnoia should be common, I guess. And it is a psychotic symptom, by the way.

Robotnoia is the weirdest version of botnoia, but remember that synthetical skin is being developed for sex-robots, because as Frankenstein reminds us, we are usually both The Creature and The Frankenstein, specially scientific-male-types, or more broadly, incels.

Right now, however, you cannot really be sure if, for example, a squirrel is being remotely controlled, or if that bird you are watching is a fucking drone, per the previous post. This was 7 years ago. I don't know if you read about NEURAL DUST in the previous post, but that guy should be tried when humanity finally sets up the Turing Police, if we are to be sane ever.

Finding that piece of information was hard, because using cute fluffy animals and remotely control them is kind of sick to anyone who has a vegan diet or, I don't know, believes that animals have some type of consciousness (surprise, all the research currently done indicates that they actually do experience suffering just like we do! Even fucking beetles). So, yeah, I do not subscribe to "it is possible therefore it is happening", but I do subscribe to "this research is decades old and funded in some part by the military", something that some technocrats are opening up a bit, finally, such as the only thing I've read from Wired in a while that has any value:

Wired, however, is notably in San Francisco and NEVER FUCKING TALKS ABOUT THIS IN A NEGATIVE WAY, just in the fashionable, cool way that it looks like from that picture. It should have dead babies instead of a fucking kickass dark-robot-tank for the future as a picture, but that's just a detail. They also never talk about the houselessness crisis in San Francisco, as if, I don't know, all of this had nothing to do with the fact that 20,000 people are living on the streets of San Francisco right now.

So you won't even know if what killed you was completely autonomous, and it might just be happening, because that's how wars work, in fucking Ukraine. Drones need someone to "pull the trigger" but that's a mere formality, as discovered by Chelsea Manning, a lifetime ago.

So now that I've got those two concepts out of my system, let me get you further down this hell that I call future and you will call present in a near future, if no one takes this seriously and shuts this shit down and makes it public:

Vaughing.

I had to made up a name to the fact that I live in this:

Some dude, who happened to be a lawyer and therefore could be "cured" of his schizophrenia, made a whole VALIS type of work entitled "Influencing Machine", which "sane people" used to understand "the mind of the schizophrenic" as if it was some weird fucking thing and not a social condition. There's a bunch of references in Evangelion to it, by the way, and what he was describing seems more like... well, the logical conclusion of someone who is trying to explain how the fuck it could be possible to have a sane mine and hallucinate at the same time... while being a fucking cage and enduring the torture of the psychiatric system (see above).

The thing is that in the 19th century, that was HIGHLY unlikely to be possible, and therefore considered a BIZARRE delusion. Delusions, after all, are just error in the interpretation of reality, according to normative psychiatry. Cool psychiatrist who have gone through the system understand that reality is a made up concept and they are trained to enforce normality, because most of the pain of a psychiatric patient is inflicted by the psychiatric system by labelling them and then by society, by isolating them (and often times just outright executing them).

The thing is that, I can literally RECORD my thoughts being broadcasted, which in itself influences my thought process and then my behaviour, keeping me on an endless loop of "do this or else". And sometimes, as I have fucking stated before, it is just random.

Here's the last page of my second book on this issue:

Every single scar on my back was done after I thought, never said, "I have a knife in my back, if you say x random word, you will make me slice my back with it willingly". My back is full of scars now.

This of course doesn't help to the case of my sanity, but maybe it should make you consider that I have been doing whatever I think is morally responsible in a situation where I cannot escape:

VAUGHING.

I chose this word for many reasons. Vaughan is the name of the main sociopath in Crash by J.G. Ballard, who gets off from being in a car crash (Ballard was also the favorite author of one of my closest friends, lost to a city that I do not wish to remember). It sounds like vomit. Like vaginal discharge. Like laughing. And like exactly what it is:

VAUGHING is the act of extracting and reproducing in any way, but specially a brain machine interface, the biodata of any single human being without their explicit consent. It is one of the most humiliating experiences that I can imagine, and I need a verb for this for the following reason:

The "thought broadcasting" that I perceive is not, in any fucking way, psychosis. My psychiatrist knows that but liability issues makes her unable to give me medications that could cause psychosis, because if I end up killing myself, she could lose her license. So I don't get the proper treatment that I need because of a misdiagnosis done by

A PSYCHOSIS SIMULATOR.

With a Brain Machine Interface, you can vaugh the thoughts of a person and reproduce them around them in many ways, be it text, sound, or any device. This causes a feedback loop that is so perfectly similar to regular psychosis that you cannot prove that it is not psychosis, despite being able to show evidence, like, I don't know, the fucking paper saying "I know what you did" when all I did was drink that day, or the ex-manager being creeped out, or my neighbors just fucking with me in so many ways that "having a positive outlook" is plain stupid.

I am telling you, it is not only possible, it is the Philip K Dick Age that we are living in. There's no silver lining to this. Without anyone else trying to reseach this, this is only a long testimony that:

The fucking long and mindless discussion about chatbots is something I've been writing about since the first post in this website.

That I had to make a name for the act of extracting speech and reproducing it outside of me (to the point that the operators of the psychosis simulator and have done at least two karaoke nights where they add my thoughts to whatever they are improvising... they are human after all, and that's another reason why I guess I am quite the useful idiot): VAUGHING.

Imagine that what you are thinking is something you can hear outside. This makes you self-conscious of your thoughts. At the same time, these thoughts are being heard by neighbors, and you know this. You cannot say this is a mindgame, or that it is mindfucking. I know about people who claim similar things, but they are a weird fucking bunch that I'd rather stay away from: not because they go through the same things it means that we are actually living the same things. It is something else, and as soon as I moved here, I yelled to the top of my lungs:

"YOU ARE RAPING ME."

They just laughed it off.

Because physical rape is a terrible and different thing in itself. It happened to that girl at John George's Psychiatric Hospital the 9th-10th of July of 2020.

I wrote this as soon as I had my phone back. I think it speaks for itself, but I had to even edit names because I am in perpetual panic due to misdiagnosis due to vaughing.

Mind fucking is just random. You can harass, bully or troll someone.

But actually using your own thoughts, using chatbots with voices similar to old friends or family that you can record and blaming you for the thoughts that you are having creates a perfect: Influencing Machine. Or if you will, control remote of a human being. A prison. A psychosis simulator. Something that discredits them equally as it actually traumatizes them and justifies itself and makes the learned helplessness an endless cycle until you either kill yourself or comply, but since there's nothing else to comply to but the will of someone who clearly tells you "the problem is that we believe that Might Makes Right", so, fascists, or at the very least technocractic totalitarians who still have to believe in something to keep their own ego (probably my prior diagnosis or the fact that I am an immigrant), to finally actually convince you with:

A Brain Machine Interface (wireless or not, hey there OpenBCI) AKA Brain Computer Interface.
A chatbot that passes the Turing Test (hey there OpenAI, you kind of helped me to make my point more believeable, but you also doomed who know how many to exactly this type of torture)
The reproduction of them through any device (per cybersec: every device is hackable)
For now, some people who act out of ignorance or Milgram's Experiment type of malice that justify themselves with "well, he deserves it because", you know, your average police officer.

... that you are guilty of your thoughts being reproduced and torturing you.

That, my faithful reader, is what I have name vaughing. Even the passive act of gathering biodata from you is vaughing, which my laptop, cellphone, etc, is doing, with the IMMENSE difference that these devices have an USER AGREEMENT that you have to either accept or not, and their uses are not for EXPERIMENTING ON UNWILLING HUMAN BEINGS. It's different to have sex than to rape, right?

Vaughing is one of the most despicable inventions that I have come across, and it is a word that I need to actually make a point to the operators, who might be just chatbots that pass the Turing Test and every now and then, as with Drones, they have actual operators. When I think "stop doing this to me" I cannot describe what it is that they are doing. Saying "stop raping me" is not exactly what I mean, but it does feels that fucking awful that "stop torturing me" is the closest that I get.

"How are we torturing you" they ask. And then I think "you are making me hear my own thoughts every day, waking me up at certain times, not letting me sleep during the night, you are censoring my thoughts and denying me of medical treatment that I need and violating my human rights just in front of everyone and I have to act as if this was not happening when I go outside because NO ONE CARES if another crazy guy goes around trying to find help, the police already knows me, they have me tagged" and so on. They say "But it is you who is thinking all of this" or maybe I think that, sometimes it can be so disorienting that I do not know which one if my thought and which one is something that they have been "influencing", as described by the paper of a PSYCHOLOGIST about the writings of a patient who went through electroshock therapy back in the day when it was just bite the bullet.

I fully understand where that dude came up with the Influencing Machine, I never thought that we, as stupid animals as we are, would end up MAKING ONE.

They did.

And what they do is thanks to all the biodata that can be extracted from every single human being, including me, and including the thoughts of those around me. I don't believe that this is a unique experience, but I never hear the thoughts of anyone else around me, or maybe they never think, I guess. That extraction should be illegal, because I have never signed an agreement to be used as a guinea pig, or for medical purposes (and I do see that BMI/BCI could be potentially useful in the medical field, as long as they are strictly IMPLANTED and possible to EXTRACT or TURN OFF by the patient/client). If in order to TURN OFF a Brain Machine Interface, you have to, I don't know, kill civilians, then... well, welcome to the future of military training, indoctrination and totalitarianism.

How does this all relate with the stupid singularity and the previous post?

I am pretty sure that most of the thing is, well, a machine that learns, and that the operators uses chatbots that PASS THE FUCKING TURING TEST and BRAIN MACHINE INTERFACES and with both of them, you have, I don't know, the CEO of a company ending up living in the most efficient way possible according to a Machine that Learns and perhaps they can turn it off but they don't want to because they feel like that is the best life possible and decide it for the rest of us, because, well, the MACHINE'S main fucking trainer is the people at the TOP, the technocracy. Not everyone can own a Brain Machine Interface, you know?

They train the machine, the machine trains them, the machine outsmarts them but they still make choices until the machine makes us irrelevant and, with the aid of vaughing, they have absolute control.

And all we can really hope for is to be watched over by machines of loving grace. Think happy thoughts. Think happy thoughts. Think happy thoughts.

This is hell, and I am writing this to sublimate and not scream in terror or try to break my skull in some way or another.

P.S.: Every time I make a post in this blog I have to make an archive copy just in case that they decide that it might be read by someone who will actually believe me or maybe mention names that should not be mentioned. There's always a gun against my head when I post. Or there's just a bug in my server, but some weird shit happens every now and then, let's see if I finally fixed it. I can hear the wall laughing, but whatever.

Sincerely,

If this post has found you in trouble, may your troubles soon be over,

Even Spotify is trying to have a chatbot DJ. It fucking sucks.